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Mate Preferences: I Prefer Someone Who...

This exercise is designed to stimulate a sharing of perspectives on what we want in a mate. Each of the choices here concerns issues considered throughout this text. In a gamelike setting, the importance of money, similarity, self-disclosure, and conflict strategies to relational desirability is explored.

"I Prefer Someone Who ..." is played in a group of five to seven people. The general procedure is as follows. Each member individually ranks each of the three alternatives in the 15 groupings listed, using 1 for the most preferred and 3 for the least preferred choice. Then the group considers each of the 15 categories, with each member giving her or his rank order. As always, members may refuse to reveal their rankings for any category by saying "I pass." The group is not permitted to question the reasons for any member’s passing. When a member has revealed rankings for a category, the group members may ask questions relevant to that category. These questions may be asked after any individual member’s response or may be reserved until all members have given their rankings for a particular category.

I prefer document

In discussing the choices of the group members, consider some or all of the following issues:

1 . What are the reasons for the choices? Where did these reasons come from? Were they acquired from parents, an older sibling, a teacher? How has your culture influenced your choices? What has your culture taught you about the "ideal" partner? Be sure to consider the reasons for the least preferred choices as well as the most preferred. Both are revealing.

To create paragraphs in your essay response, type at the beginning of the paragraph, and at the end.

2 . Do men and women make similar choices? Explain.

To create paragraphs in your essay response, type at the beginning of the paragraph, and at the end.

3 . Does an ideal man or an ideal woman emerge from the composite rankings? Does a least preferred man or a least preferred woman emerge? If so, describe these types as specifically as possible.

To create paragraphs in your essay response, type at the beginning of the paragraph, and at the end.

4 . If the title of this exercise were "I am someone who...," how similarly or differently would you respond to these choices? How close to yourself is your ideal mate?

To create paragraphs in your essay response, type at the beginning of the paragraph, and at the end.

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