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Humor

The following phrases, frequently found in research reports, are defined below.

It has been long known: I haven't bothered to check the references
It is known: I believe
It is believed: I think
It is generally believed: My colleagues and I think
There has been some discussion: Nobody agrees with me
It can be shown: Take my word for it
It is proven: It agrees with something mathematical
Of great theoretical importance: I find it interesting
Of great practical importance: This justifies my employment
Of great historical importance: This ought to make me famous
Some samples were chosen for study: The others didn't make sense
Typical results are shown: The best results are shown
Correct within order of magnitude: Wrong
The values were obtained empirically: The values were obtained by accident
The results are inconclusive: The results seem to disprove my hypothesis
Additional work is required: Someone else can work out the details
The investigations proved rewarding: My grant has been renewed





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