Test Yourself: How Romantic Are You?
Indicate the extent to which you agree or disagree with each of the following beliefs. Use the following scale: Agree strongly = 7, Agree a good deal = 6, Agree somewhat = 5, Neither agree nor disagree = 4, Disagree somewhat = 3, Disagree a good deal = 2, Disagree strongly = 1.
_____ 1. I don't need to know someone for a period of time before I fall in love with him or her.
_____ 2. If I were in love with someone, I would commit myself to him or her even if my parents and friends disapproved of the relationship.
_____ 3. Once I experience "true love," I could never experience it again, to the same degree, with another person.
_____ 4. I believe that to be truly in love is to be in love forever.
_____ 5. If I love someone, I know I can make the relationship work, despite any obstacles.
_____ 6. When I find my "true love" I will probably know it soon after we meet.
_____ 7. I'm sure that every new thing I learn about the person I choose for a long-term commitment will please me.
_____ 8. The relationship I will have with my "true love'' will be nearly perfect.
_____ 9. If I love someone, I will find a way for us to be together regardless of the opposition to the relationship, physical distance between us or any other barrier.
_____ 10. There will be only one real love for me.
_____ 11. If a relationship I have was meant to be, any obstacles (for example, lack of money, physical distance, career conflicts) can be overcome.
_____ 12. I am likely to fall in love almost immediately if I meet the right person.
_____ 13. I expect that in my relationship, romantic love will really last; it won't fade with time.
_____ 14. The person I love will make a perfect romantic partner; for example, he/she will be completely accepting, loving, and understanding.
_____ 15. I believe if another person and I love each other we can overcome any differences and problems that may arise.
How did you do? To compute your romanticism score, add your scores for all 15 items. The higher your score, the stronger your romantic beliefs are. In research by Sprecher and Metts (1989), the mean score for this test was 60.45 for males and females taken together. The mean score for males was 62.55 and for females 59.10. How romantic are your beliefs compared to this research sample?
What will you do? Does your level of romanticism make for satisfying interpersonal relationships? If not, would you want to increase your level of romanticism? Would you want to decrease it? What specific steps might you take to achieve these changes?
Source: Susan Sprecher and Sandra Metts, "Development of the "Romantic Beliefs Scale" and Examination of the Effects of Gender and Gender-Role Orientation," Journal of Social and Personal Relationships 6:387–411. Copyright © 1989 Sage Publications Ltd. Reprinted by permission of Sage Publications Ltd.